Our Society Vs US

Well… I am a female and I am not a feminist. But wait….neither am I ignorant about the way our society functions. Thus I could not hold myself from sharing a few observations with you. These fundamental rules exist despite us calling ourselves an egalitarian and progressive society.

Observation 1: The Name Game.

Why does the prefix of our names have to be an indicator of our marital status? … if married.. Mrs. If not Miss… why can’t we universally be known as Ms, like men, who can simply write a Mr. before their names, which is neutral to their marital standing.

Marriage does not mean revamping the woman’s identity, thus according to me, it is not required for one to change one’s surname post marriage.

Observation 2: The Double Dhamaka.

Do you find it difficult to adjust to the mood swings of your boss? I hear a BIG yesss…. We women have two bosses to deal with… one at workplace and one at home. The one at home is called “mother-in-law” who also fosters the notion that she should be expecting few things from the ‘ghar ka bahu’.

Observation 3: Time up!

This is the most ridiculous and harshest but most predominant observation of all. The society has its own way of telling girls that she needs to get married. Now, getting married means trading her family, with her husband’s family. That is….. One fine morning someone says time up!!! ……And she is expected to leave her teary parents and go and live among a new set of parents…. A new mom, a new dad and new siblings… well the husband does not have to go through any such ordeals… as he did not have to trade any of his family members to live with his wife and thus he enjoys the comfort of his ‘original’ family merrily.

Observation 4: Torchbearer

When a child is born, automatically ‘he’ becomes a member of the husband’s family, taking his surname by default. Thus ‘he’ becomes the Chirag of the family… talking the responsibility of the continuity of ‘the family name’ in his tiny shoulders. Well…. The contribution towards the zygote formation was equal with an additional nine months effort on the woman’s part…so... What went wrong?

Observation 5: Mirror! Mirror! on the Wall….

What is considered beautiful, which type of figure is considered perfect… curly hair or straight…. Sober or vulgar …working or homemaker…men usually set standards according to their whims and conveniences… and we try to live up to that by starving ourselves , even if our heart calls out for a delicious chocolate cake, by pretending to be sober even after that 4^th peg when your heart wants to laugh aloud dance heartily….all because we don’t want to seem ‘easy’ or get stigmatized.

Observation 6: foolproof assumption.

Women are expected to dress sensibly i.e. by taking the vulnerabilities of men into account. Men need not comply, nor have they to think twice before wearing a shorts and walking into a mall. Is the assumption that, that woman’s sensory faculties are seduction proof?

Well!! Now if you think that the answer to all this is….. ‘Because ours is a patriarchal society’ … IT IS TIME WE THINK CHANGE.